The Duckburg Gazette

Dedicated to Uncle Donald, who has survived three nephews, one rich uncle, and an uncountable number of exploding hammocks. Replace this with your own dedication, or keep it. He has earned it.

Compiled on 2026-10-18 by the Junior Woodchucks, Troop 1, Duckburg chapter.

Hughie · Dewey · Louie

"Work smarter, not harder. And if that fails, check the Guidebook."

— Junior Woodchucks proverb, probably

From the Money Bin

Uncle Scrooge wants it known that this newsletter cost nothing to produce, and that he would like that to stay true. The paper is recycled from old ledgers. The ink is thinned with Duckburg tap water. The staples are counted.

A word on the Number One Dime

Visitors to the Money Bin may look at the Number One Dime. Visitors may not touch, breathe on, photograph, or think too hard about the Number One Dime. Magica De Spell has been notified that the same rules apply to her.

Dispatches from the Field

This issue's expeditions, as reported by the troop:

The Beagle Boys were seen near Killmotor Hill on Tuesday. Residents are asked to report any duck wearing a prison number and a domino mask, even a very friendly one.

Notes from the Guidebook

Every Junior Woodchuck carries the Junior Woodchucks Guidebook, which has an answer for everything except why Uncle Donald won't let anyone else hold the boat's tiller. This issue's selections:

1. In quicksand, lie flat and stay calm. Then blame Louie.
2. To tell real gold from fool's gold, ask Uncle Scrooge. He'll know by smell.
3. When three nephews disagree, the middle one breaks the tie. The middle one is Dewey. Dewey would like this written down.

Next issue: a full accounting of the hammock incident, if Uncle Donald's lawyer allows it.